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| So, I guess i am going home.Going home a failure.I moved here for a reason.....to straighten my life out, which i have fucked up even more.I miss my peoples back home so much, but i realize when i leave, i will be hurting people here as well.Shanna, I love you and lil man so much....I hope you will understand.I?left?so much?undone back home.I guess thats what i get for deciding to leave, and leaving?the next day.?I am gonna fuck so much shit up by showing up back home.Frank is supposed to get married soon....HAHAHHAHAH....that will change when i get home.He was in heaven without me in the picture.He thought without me there, he could be with her, and not think of me.?So me moving to florida was music to his ears, no interference with his life.Boy is he gonna be SO FUCKING HAPPY to see me again.? |
| Boy is he gonna be SO FUCKING HAPPY to see me again.?However, i am staying away from all that.I already sent Rob a message that things won't work out between us.Maybe when he realizes he is perfect the way he is, things will be different.?Rob, U are beautiful the way you are, fuck what everyone thinks of you.I miss the man i fell in love with 2 years ago.?Image is nothing.The cuddling on the couch, watching law and order, waking up next to you, and sitting at lakeview to watch the football games?that we never watched cuz we were too busy socializing.?But until then, my main focus is work and school.?It is so weird, i don't wanna leave, but i want to.?I miss all my family and friends.?I hate the fact?I left them as well.I miss Debi like WHOA. |
| I miss Debi like WHOA.She is the greatest person ever....to deal with my shit, and still love me as much as she does, it takes a strong person to deal with all that.?I feel like i am missing so much from my nieces and nephews, i love them sooooo much.?I never felt my life was worth anything until they came along.And as much as i cried (which was everytime!hahahahaa) Linda, I love them like they are mine.?I am sure you know that.?I can't wait to wrap my arms around them!?This time is gonna be so different.NO more partying for me. NO more playin guys.I have given up on assholes.?No more relationships for me, or near relationships!Hahaha.? |
| Hahaha.?I have seriously had it with men.?I am sick of the drama....but anyways.I feel like i am doing something wrong.?I will miss all my TRU friends.?Yall know who you are.?Man oh man.....The worse thing is, i was part of 2 peoples lives.People who will never forget me or the impact i had on their lives.?The way lil man's face lights up when he sees me....the trust my best friend has in me. I love you both Shanna and Chi.?Yall make me so happy and give me a reason to be happy.?I know you have a rough road ahead of you Shanna, but you can do it.?If my sister can with 4 kids and no help, you can do it with you and your momma.?I will miss her too.? |
| I will miss her too.?I have never had my best friends mom talk me out of leaving like she did.?I try to hide my sadness as much as i can, BUT, i am alone here at home.....so i can let it out!hee hee!?Shanna, I love you so much.?You have touched a place in my heart no one else has.NO ONE can ever have what we had.?I am sorry i am leaving.?I think of you and Chi, and i just bawl.?I love you both so much.?But please understand, I need to fix some unfinished business.?I <3 u boo bear!?Well, I think this is enough for one night.? |
| Well, I think this is enough for one night.?Thank you everyone for listening to me pour my heart out.I <3 you all! |
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Last Updated ( Thursday, 17 July 2008 )
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